Today is a good day. It is sunny and not too hot or humid and I like it that way. And Mr. H2O is out of town on a business trip today so I have plenty of extra time to work today without worrying about what to do for dinner or if all the laundry is done.
Today, I also have a new sense of clarity. Last night, Mr H2O and I turned off all radio, TV, and closed the laptops and just spent time in the quiet talking with no distractions. It was really nice. I think we should do this one night a week, and I recommend it to every married couple.
And we were finally able to talk over the baby issue (my latest obsession) and really TALK about it. And the good thing is now I've been let in on the secret of what will take us from almost to Yes. It makes sense and I am totally ok with it. And now I know what goal and timeline that we are shooting for and I feel so much better. That was the part that was driving me crazy. The unknown staring me in the face and my impatience was getting the better of me.
I feel good and I'm excited. But this is our secret and our lips are sealed. So when are we go to start trying? No one is going to get it out of me. Even Mom. So stop asking.
Wednesday, June 6, 2007
Sunday, June 3, 2007
Married Life of H2O
Just celebrated our 3rd wedding anniversary! Yeah!
Mr. H2O and I celebrated 3 married years together on Tuesday (the 29th). We went and had a nice quiet dinner at one of my favorite places, Dock's Oyster House in Atlantic City and we practically closed the place down. It was a weekday after Memorial Day weekend an we came in a bit later in the evening, so obviously it was not very busy. But it was nice, we had the place almost to ourselves. I love that restaurant, but it is really only a place we can go for special occasions like that since it's a bit expensive.
Overall, it's been a great three years. Sometimes it feels like longer, but that's because we've been together about 7 years now. We've enjoyed being married and our time as just to two of us. But I think the time of being just the two of us is coming to an end... well at least I hope it is coming to an end... soon.
I of course have total baby fever and it's growing by the day. I've probably had it for the whole 3 years we've been married, but now it is getting unbearable. Now it seems everyone I know has just found out they are pregnant or just had a baby. Don't get me wrong, I am totally thrilled for all of them and so happy that they are starting their families. But I want it to be my turn now, it is time. Mr. H2O is making us wait.
What's the hurry? I'm not in a hurry, it's just time. I've always wanted to be a mom my whole life, and I'm at the perfect point in my life to be able to do that with my home business and our improved money sitution. I'm almost 28, and though a lot would say that I "have plenty of time", I was diagnosed with PCOS and that's a strike against me. I'm worried about what problems that will cause and if we don't start now, as I get older it will be harder to conceive. My grandma always says 90% of the things you worry about never happen... but I'm still gonna worry.
At this point, Mr. H2O says he's at "almost". Now I'm just trying to figure out what takes him from "almost" to "sure let's go for it". In the meantime, I'll just look at all the pictures of my friends and families' babies and nurseries and hope my turn is coming soon.
Mr. H2O and I celebrated 3 married years together on Tuesday (the 29th). We went and had a nice quiet dinner at one of my favorite places, Dock's Oyster House in Atlantic City and we practically closed the place down. It was a weekday after Memorial Day weekend an we came in a bit later in the evening, so obviously it was not very busy. But it was nice, we had the place almost to ourselves. I love that restaurant, but it is really only a place we can go for special occasions like that since it's a bit expensive.
Overall, it's been a great three years. Sometimes it feels like longer, but that's because we've been together about 7 years now. We've enjoyed being married and our time as just to two of us. But I think the time of being just the two of us is coming to an end... well at least I hope it is coming to an end... soon.
I of course have total baby fever and it's growing by the day. I've probably had it for the whole 3 years we've been married, but now it is getting unbearable. Now it seems everyone I know has just found out they are pregnant or just had a baby. Don't get me wrong, I am totally thrilled for all of them and so happy that they are starting their families. But I want it to be my turn now, it is time. Mr. H2O is making us wait.
What's the hurry? I'm not in a hurry, it's just time. I've always wanted to be a mom my whole life, and I'm at the perfect point in my life to be able to do that with my home business and our improved money sitution. I'm almost 28, and though a lot would say that I "have plenty of time", I was diagnosed with PCOS and that's a strike against me. I'm worried about what problems that will cause and if we don't start now, as I get older it will be harder to conceive. My grandma always says 90% of the things you worry about never happen... but I'm still gonna worry.
At this point, Mr. H2O says he's at "almost". Now I'm just trying to figure out what takes him from "almost" to "sure let's go for it". In the meantime, I'll just look at all the pictures of my friends and families' babies and nurseries and hope my turn is coming soon.
Sunday, May 27, 2007
It's Memorial Day Weekend
So it's Sunday of Memorial day weekend, and it's been a bit of time since I wrote here last. Things are going. I did make it to Onederland, and I finally found a new bathing suit at Kohls for a great deal. But I have been hovering at the same weight over the last few weeks since I kind-of stopped trying.
My business has gotten so busy that I barely have time to do laundry and make dinner, let alone get a work out in. And I've been eating like crap the last couple days and I need to get that in check. It just seems to take so much effort to eat healthy all the time, and if I don't plan ahead and work it all out ahead of time, I don't do as well. But the problem is that I don't have enough time. I feel like my business is running me, instead of me running my business. It is getting me down.
I remarked to Mr. H2O last week that I'm trying really hard to be happy, or that I have been unhappy. Part of it is liking where we live and being used to New Jersey. I like my house, the area is ok, but I guess I am just lonely here. I miss my family, and Jeff's family is great, but they can't sub in totally for my own family. And still don't any friends around here. It's really hard. Another part is the baby issue, which I will get into another time. And the largest reason right now is my business.
At this point my business is running me. I feel like I am drowning in work and I feel guilty when I decide to take an off day. This was not what I envisioned for my business or what I really wanted. And I'm not really sure that I want to grow my business beyond what it is now. It seems that hiring subcontractors and managing them would even be more work. Just getting systems in place to be organized are enough work. I know that Mr. H2O thinks I should grow and do this, and what he wants me to do. But I don't know if I want it. I don't think I ever meant for this to grow beyond my one-woman opperation. I want to have a family. I want to be a Mom. My business was a way to provide income for us by doing what I wanted. And eventually I would pull back when we started our family. I wanted to be a mom to my kids. I don't want to run a virtual staffing agency.
I wanted success for my business, but I never really saw where this could actually take me. Was I afraid of success?
Regardless of all this, I need help. This is where I am at, I have a sucessful business that I cannot give up on and I need to continue to work at it. And most of all, I need an assistant. If not one for my business, one to clean my house and cook meals. I'm tired of feeling like things are out of my control and I am dangerously close to burning out.
My business has gotten so busy that I barely have time to do laundry and make dinner, let alone get a work out in. And I've been eating like crap the last couple days and I need to get that in check. It just seems to take so much effort to eat healthy all the time, and if I don't plan ahead and work it all out ahead of time, I don't do as well. But the problem is that I don't have enough time. I feel like my business is running me, instead of me running my business. It is getting me down.
I remarked to Mr. H2O last week that I'm trying really hard to be happy, or that I have been unhappy. Part of it is liking where we live and being used to New Jersey. I like my house, the area is ok, but I guess I am just lonely here. I miss my family, and Jeff's family is great, but they can't sub in totally for my own family. And still don't any friends around here. It's really hard. Another part is the baby issue, which I will get into another time. And the largest reason right now is my business.
At this point my business is running me. I feel like I am drowning in work and I feel guilty when I decide to take an off day. This was not what I envisioned for my business or what I really wanted. And I'm not really sure that I want to grow my business beyond what it is now. It seems that hiring subcontractors and managing them would even be more work. Just getting systems in place to be organized are enough work. I know that Mr. H2O thinks I should grow and do this, and what he wants me to do. But I don't know if I want it. I don't think I ever meant for this to grow beyond my one-woman opperation. I want to have a family. I want to be a Mom. My business was a way to provide income for us by doing what I wanted. And eventually I would pull back when we started our family. I wanted to be a mom to my kids. I don't want to run a virtual staffing agency.
I wanted success for my business, but I never really saw where this could actually take me. Was I afraid of success?
Regardless of all this, I need help. This is where I am at, I have a sucessful business that I cannot give up on and I need to continue to work at it. And most of all, I need an assistant. If not one for my business, one to clean my house and cook meals. I'm tired of feeling like things are out of my control and I am dangerously close to burning out.
Tuesday, May 8, 2007
A Good Month, But Help Needed
So it's been a month since I've been here last, but I must say it was a pretty good one. The best news is that I have lost a total of 30 lbs now and I have reached "Onderland" (in the 100's). I haven't been there in over 5 years. I couldn't be more thrilled and I am feeling really good about myself. And I can now visually see my results so far which is a first.
So other good news, my business has really taken off in the past couple months and I have reached capacity for clients and have a full practice. It is very exciting and really helps Mr. H2O and I out a lot. All this is really great, but it is causing me some extra stress because I am worrying about getting all my client's hours in, while still taking care of myself and taking care of my husband and house. Well the latter 3 are suffering a bit.
I am still eating healthy and staying on the diet, but I am not getting as much sleep and I am not getting ANY work outs in lately. And I have gotten REALLY behind my house work with laundry piling up, dishes piling, and I even heard Jeff pick up a broom so it must be bad. I am trying, but I know I can try harder. The biggest thing is that I need to spend less time doing non-billable items early in the day like I normally do and save it for later when I usually hit the wall on "work" type stuff. And I know if I immediately get up and get "dressed to the shoes" that I get a lot more accomplished and it gives me a little more energy. Time to get back to FlyLady.
But even with improving my daily habits and such, I still would like to grow my business a little more and am considering hiring my own assistant. I am just one phonecall away from freaking a little as I don't think I can physically handle another new client and I need to figure out how to remedy this. Michael Russer, well respected real estate speaker/coach had said that there are more Real Estate Professionals out there that need VA's than Virtual Assistants to handle them. I didn't believe him at first, but I am starting to believe him now. I wish I could clone myself, but I guess it's time to begin my assistant or subcontractor search instead of waiting for science.
So other good news, my business has really taken off in the past couple months and I have reached capacity for clients and have a full practice. It is very exciting and really helps Mr. H2O and I out a lot. All this is really great, but it is causing me some extra stress because I am worrying about getting all my client's hours in, while still taking care of myself and taking care of my husband and house. Well the latter 3 are suffering a bit.
I am still eating healthy and staying on the diet, but I am not getting as much sleep and I am not getting ANY work outs in lately. And I have gotten REALLY behind my house work with laundry piling up, dishes piling, and I even heard Jeff pick up a broom so it must be bad. I am trying, but I know I can try harder. The biggest thing is that I need to spend less time doing non-billable items early in the day like I normally do and save it for later when I usually hit the wall on "work" type stuff. And I know if I immediately get up and get "dressed to the shoes" that I get a lot more accomplished and it gives me a little more energy. Time to get back to FlyLady.
But even with improving my daily habits and such, I still would like to grow my business a little more and am considering hiring my own assistant. I am just one phonecall away from freaking a little as I don't think I can physically handle another new client and I need to figure out how to remedy this. Michael Russer, well respected real estate speaker/coach had said that there are more Real Estate Professionals out there that need VA's than Virtual Assistants to handle them. I didn't believe him at first, but I am starting to believe him now. I wish I could clone myself, but I guess it's time to begin my assistant or subcontractor search instead of waiting for science.
Wednesday, April 4, 2007
William Popkes 1939-2007
My father called me Monday and told me my grandfather had passed away earlier in the day Monday morning at the age of 67. It is sad but he was comfortable, not in any pain and knew that we all loved and cared about him.
My grandfathers life was interesting and took lots of twists and turns. He was always full of wisdom and life lessons, and wouldn't hesitate to teach you if you ask. As long as I had known him, he lead a mostly solitary lifestyle, but we would visit him and welcome him in our homes as often as we could. He was not the type that would run and play with us, but he loved us in his way.
Though it is sad to have him gone, there are a few things that I can take and learn from his story. For many years he battled several health problems including type 2 diabetes and congestive heart failure and we often worried about him. This was mostly due to the fact that he did not take the best care of himself by eating mostly take-out and junk-food and we weren't always sure he had his diabetes under control. He also had a very sedintary lifestyle and got to the point where he could not walk 10 feet without being out of breath. This last year, he would spend 23 hours a day in his recliner, and was in and out of hospitals from getting pneumonia or the flu. His body finally lost the battle and he slowly slipped away from us this past weekend.
What I take from this is how important it is to take care of ourselves and our bodies. It is true, our body is a temple and we need to treat it as such. Since diabetes runs in both sides of my family with very close relatives, I want to work my hardest to stave off diabetes and live until a healthy old age. I already had my warning and if I didn't change things, I would be well on my way . I want to see my future kids grow up, run around with my future grandkids and be fit and healthy all the way through.
My grandfather was loved and will be missed very much. He is no longer struggling to live, no longer in pain and is hopefully in a much better place now. All I hope know is that he know that I love him.
My grandfathers life was interesting and took lots of twists and turns. He was always full of wisdom and life lessons, and wouldn't hesitate to teach you if you ask. As long as I had known him, he lead a mostly solitary lifestyle, but we would visit him and welcome him in our homes as often as we could. He was not the type that would run and play with us, but he loved us in his way.
Though it is sad to have him gone, there are a few things that I can take and learn from his story. For many years he battled several health problems including type 2 diabetes and congestive heart failure and we often worried about him. This was mostly due to the fact that he did not take the best care of himself by eating mostly take-out and junk-food and we weren't always sure he had his diabetes under control. He also had a very sedintary lifestyle and got to the point where he could not walk 10 feet without being out of breath. This last year, he would spend 23 hours a day in his recliner, and was in and out of hospitals from getting pneumonia or the flu. His body finally lost the battle and he slowly slipped away from us this past weekend.
What I take from this is how important it is to take care of ourselves and our bodies. It is true, our body is a temple and we need to treat it as such. Since diabetes runs in both sides of my family with very close relatives, I want to work my hardest to stave off diabetes and live until a healthy old age. I already had my warning and if I didn't change things, I would be well on my way . I want to see my future kids grow up, run around with my future grandkids and be fit and healthy all the way through.
My grandfather was loved and will be missed very much. He is no longer struggling to live, no longer in pain and is hopefully in a much better place now. All I hope know is that he know that I love him.
Life and Times
So here is the first official post on my personal blog. The direction of this blog will be mostly dictated by my weightloss journey, personal feelings durring the week, and whatever else I feel like. This one will be my fun blog where people can really know what I'm like and how I feel.
So what's my story? Well, the name is Megan, I'm 27 years old, married to Jeff the love of my life, and we live together is beautiful south Jersey. And I'm a big girl. I've always been the "big girl" and have struggled with weight issues most of my life. Last fall I was at my absolute biggest at 228lbs and it started affecting my body. At that time after a battery of tests and bloodwork I was diagnosed with PCOS and my doctor had other concerns and pointed his finger at me saying "I want you to lose weight". With PCOS and knocking on the door to diabetes, I needed to make a change, and it took my doctor to say it to knock some sense into me. So October of 2006 is when I jumped in with both feet and took control of my life and my health.
I joined Weight Watchers in October starting at 228. With a trip to Cancun and the holidays, I stalled a few times, but I reached my 10% goal at the beginning of March. Also in March, I joined the wonderful Spark People (Free Online Diet Plan at SparkPeople.com) to do in conjunction with WW and it has given me an awesome motivational kick. And as of today I am down to 203 and have lost a total of 25lbs! Only about 60lbs more to go.
It's gonna take a while and it won't be easy, but I have to do it. I need to get healthy so we can have a baby. I need to stave off diabetes.
I don't want to be the big girl anymore.
By the way Spark People is one of the greatest tools out there that I have found and recommend this to ANYONE to try it!
Get a Free Online Diet
So what's my story? Well, the name is Megan, I'm 27 years old, married to Jeff the love of my life, and we live together is beautiful south Jersey. And I'm a big girl. I've always been the "big girl" and have struggled with weight issues most of my life. Last fall I was at my absolute biggest at 228lbs and it started affecting my body. At that time after a battery of tests and bloodwork I was diagnosed with PCOS and my doctor had other concerns and pointed his finger at me saying "I want you to lose weight". With PCOS and knocking on the door to diabetes, I needed to make a change, and it took my doctor to say it to knock some sense into me. So October of 2006 is when I jumped in with both feet and took control of my life and my health.
I joined Weight Watchers in October starting at 228. With a trip to Cancun and the holidays, I stalled a few times, but I reached my 10% goal at the beginning of March. Also in March, I joined the wonderful Spark People (Free Online Diet Plan at SparkPeople.com) to do in conjunction with WW and it has given me an awesome motivational kick. And as of today I am down to 203 and have lost a total of 25lbs! Only about 60lbs more to go.
It's gonna take a while and it won't be easy, but I have to do it. I need to get healthy so we can have a baby. I need to stave off diabetes.
I don't want to be the big girl anymore.
By the way Spark People is one of the greatest tools out there that I have found and recommend this to ANYONE to try it!
Get a Free Online Diet
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